Thursday, August 28, 2014

Screw You Fate! (just kidding fate...playing to the audience...no offense intended)

Went back to my home state, 16 long hours across 6 states.  I'm going to create a video game called Escape Montana, the goal being finding the border. It felt like we were in Montana 15 of those 16 hours.  It just would not end.  

While I was there, I went on my first trail ride since surgery.  I was riding Katie, she used to be kept at my house so I knew her pretty well.  We went with 4 other people and Katie wanted to keep up.  I wanted to go slow...like walk slow.  She thought that was B.S and that I was stifling her equine enthusiasm so some head tossing and pulling was involved.  I just wanted to stay at the back of the pack with another rider on an older horse.  

We went up hills and down, my left numb leg struggled so I listed to the right and the saddle wanted to pull over some.  Let's hear it for breastplates that help hold saddles in place!  When I walk I list to the left so at least it was a change of pace.  Now here is the exciting news!  I got off and I felt fine.  Like really, no worse than normal and normal is fine.  Yay!  I felt fine the next day too!  Double Yay!  Screw you fate.  I'll ride if I want too.  

All in all, the entire trip was great.  I was a bit achy due to driving, activities and a different bed and as usual, slow and limpy but hey, whatever.  My dear friend gave me a beautiful saddle and matching bridle and breastplate that will fit my giant horse Rome.  I have some confidence born from not dying on my trail ride.  Things are okee dokee.

We had a great time visiting friends and family and just hanging out. Shopping, cooking, eating and of course making soap.   It was a great trip and much needed.  

Another dear friend had a nasty spill off her motorcycle and I had a chance to see her at the physical rehab facility.  To her, I believe in you and your ability to make a full recovery.  Be easy on yourself and celebrate the little improvements!  Sometimes they feel few and far between, but thankfully, we do heal!
  

Wednesday, August 13, 2014

One Year and Counting

Today, one year ago things changed.  In the rather mundane task of picking up a bar of commercial soap (I note that because few people realize the dangers of using soap that is not hand crafted), a bar  that had fallen on the shower floor, I destroyed a disc in my back.  One bar of soap and one year later.  

I'm still recovering, I think I may be recovering for the rest of my life.  I wouldn't be surprised, I'm still trying to lose the last 5 pounds of baby weight and my daughter is 22 now.  Things take time.  It can be hard to be patient though.

I must be honest, I am not exactly where I envisioned myself.  In 5 days it will be the anniversary of my 1st surgery and then a few weeks later my second surgery.  So, because lists are fun lets see what I can now do that I could not do a year ago....wheeee!
- I can sleep in my bed
- I can walk up and down stairs like a grown up
- I can walk without falling down
- I am not taking truckloads of pain medication (my liver thanks me)
- I can stand upright
- I can pretty much live my life

What I cannot do
- stand on my left tiptoes
- walk in heels
- stop whining about the injustice of it all 
- feel half my left stupid leg
- run... Ok I've never really run like a normal person, I've always cantered.  I can canter on my right lead, I cannot canter well on my left lead.  Ask a horse person what I'm talking about.

What I should be able to do but seem to be having problems
- be brave enough to ride again
- walk with less of a limp.  I have gotten accustomed to limping, I tried to walk with less of a limp, roll of my weird numb toes more and I can.  Limping has become a bad habit.

What have I learned?  Life is pretty unpredictable.  I have had some crazy falls from horses, I've been in car accidents, I've lived an active and not risk free life.  I got taken down by a bar of soap.  So, enjoy every minute.  Enjoy the small things.  And most importantly, buy safe hand crafted soap, I just happen to have some.